Chakmate: Triumphs & Failures

Posted: February 20, 2011 by pchak25 in Freak Stuff

Every Sunday I will give my triumphs & failures of the week highlighted by the “Ultimate Fail” of the week (idea compliments of Gary Zeck of the PFLA- Pedobears For Life Association). Enjoy!

Failure: ME! In my last blog post I talked about some NCAA bubble teams that I thought could make a run in the tourney. Well, of the 6 teams I spoke of, 4 lost this weekend including Washington St., Richmond, St. Mary’s & Cleveland St. I still like Cleveland St. & Richmond to get at large bids but St. Mary’s better beat Gonzaga this week and Washington St. now needs a big late season push.

Triumph: Those feisty Cards! The Dieng-led Cards (yeah, I said it) bested UCONN for the second time this season and finally have a healthy team. 

Triumph:  The Wildcats routed South Carolina- let’s see if they can keep that momentum going.

Failure: The top 10- that is the NCAA top 10 and David Letterman’s. Kansas, Ohio St., Texas, Pitt, Notre Dame, Georgetown, & Wisconsin all lost this week. Who will be #1? And David Letterman- you haven’t been funny in 15 years and the top 10 list is never funny. Step aside and let Craig Ferguson take the reins old man… “Oh My!”

Failure: Whoever does UCONN’s schedule. So let’s see… you schedule a Wednesday game at Georgetown knowing you have to play Louisville Friday night? Does flying to Washington D.C., then back to Connecticut, then to Louisville in the span of 48 hours make any damn sense? You set your team up for failure, way to go.

Triumph: Lindsay Lohan. I know you expect me to list her as a Failure, but the girl is smoking hot and looks better than ever. Kudos to you Ms. Lohan…

Failure: The State of Michigan… what? I hate Michigan. That is all.

Failure: NBA Hall of Fame selection committee. Reggie Miller was robbed- his time will come.

Triumph: Actual music. I’m not a fan of Arcade Fire, but at least they play instruments and sing their own songs and they were awarded Best Album at the Grammy’s. Also taking home some gold was one of my favorite bands The Black Keys.

Failure: Christina Aguilera. It is bad enough you screwed up the National Anthem and coat your face with clown like make up, but then you go and attempt to honor Aretha Franklin by blaring out some bad notes and tripping as you walked off the stage.

Failure: Carmelo Anthony/The Knicks/The Nets/Media. I think we all are sick and tired of this fiasco. Hey Knickerbockers, how about telling Anthony to not sign an extension with the Nets and wait until the season is over and sign him that way you don’t implode your team and give away really good players like Felton and Gallinari.

Triumph: Kris King and Trevor Kelsey with their blog contributions! Way to go fellas.

Triumph: Finally, The Rock has come back to wrestling! I am not a big wrestling fan but at least it will be funny again.

Failure: Oh Fedor, age is cruel. You not only got the crap kicked out of you but your eye resembles Rihanna after Kris Brown got done with her. Hopefully you haven’t screwed everybody in town like her though (lucky bastards!).

Triumph: Nebraska with a huge win against Texas. I’m sure my buddy and Texas alum Travis wasn’t happy to see it, but the Cornhuskers find themselves now in the discussion for an at-large bid.

Triumph: Trevor Bane for winning the Daytona 500

Failure: NASCAR. Outside of 10 states nobody cares about your product and don’t know who the hell Trevor Bane is.

Failure: The NBA dunk contest. Way to purposefully screw over Demar Derozan, Serge Ibaka, & Javale Mcgee. All displayed wonderful and creative dunks but the NBA made up its mind that Blake Griffin would win no matter what. They even gave him a choir and a Kia. I still say Mcgee should have jumped the length of the Kia, unlike Griffin who cleared the hood.

Triumph: Duke, yet again, beat North Carolina. This rivalry is getting very lopsided.

Failure: Lady Gaga. You are not artistic because you spent a few days in an egg. That makes you a douche, or David Blaine… same difference. Also, the new song sounds exactly like Madonna- I don’t think it’s gay that I know that.

Triumph: Old spice commercials. Need I say more.

Triumph: Billy Ray Cyrus for blaming him and his wife for their daughter rebelling. Something tells me the wife is much more to blame in this one. Or it just could be that she’s an 18 year old girl and wants to party because she is successful and can do whatever she wants.

Failure: Russel Brand did his best to be funny on SNL and failed miserably. Stick to movies and banging your smoking hot wife.

Triumph: Pickles. Your deliciousness knows no bounds.

**** AND THE “ULTIMATE FAILURE OF THE WEEK IS…. (IMAGINE A DRUM ROLL)…….

THE LOS ANGELES LAKERS WHO NOT ONLY LOST BY 20 TO CHARLOTTE BUT LOST TO THE LOWLY CLEVELAND CAVALIERS. FAIL!  

FAIL!

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